Belly Like a Watermelon

My sister is working on a motherhood project and asked me to write up a short piece for her.  Since I've already put the work into writing something, I'd thought I'd share it here as well.  Be sure to check out her whole series when she posts it on Facebook!

8 Days overdue and on our way to the wedding

Whenever you first find out your due date, everybody stars their mental timers.  You can almost here the countdown, 5...4...3...2...1... and then BOOM it is your due date and the baby is born.  In reality, due dates do not work like that.  They are just educated guesses based on the average woman and a normal pregnancy lasts anywhere from 38-42 weeks.  According to current research, as long as mama and baby are both healthy, it is safer for the baby to remain in the womb than to induce as inductions increase the risk of c-section, uterine ruptures, and infection.

My first baby was born only two days after her due date, so when I got pregnant with baby #2, I assumed it would be similar.  Around 37 weeks, I packed my hospital bags and began waiting for the baby to arrive.  His due date came...and went with no sign of impending labor.  I began to get regular texts and phone calls asking if I was in labor.  Every time my midwife checked me and declared that I was still not really effaced or dilated, I would leave her office in tears.  I tried every kind of safe, natural induction method on the internet including squatting, walking, drinking red raspberry leaf tea, and accupressure videos on youtube.  Nothing worked and every time we went somewhere and someone commented on how I was still pregnant, I was freshly reminded of my body's failure to produce the baby.  Sometimes I could deal with the comments and questions, which were all meant kindly.  However on other days, I would come home from an event bitter and near tears.  Each day that passed produced yet another ugly red stretch mark on my belly.  A week and half after my due date, my midwife encouraged me to get an induction since both her and her back-up doctor were going out of town for a few days.  The thought of an induction added to my stress and every day that passed made me feel more and more like a failure.  

On the day before my midwife wanted to induce, I began to have some bleeding.  My midwife checked me and said that I was still not effaced or dilated and I was convinced that I was going to be eternally pregnant unless I went ahead and got induced.  Later that same afternoon, I began to have some light contractions and the baby was born 12 hours later.  My body made up for its earlier failure to progress by going from 4-10 cm in a record 2 hours.  

When I found out I was pregnant with my third child, I did things different from the very beginning.  When people would ask me about my due date, I would respond that we expected the baby to come at the end of the month and told very few people my actual due date which was in the middle of the month.  I also began to mentally prepare myself for a late baby.  It was no surprise to me that my due date passed with no sign of the baby.  In general, I refused to be checked by my midwife as I knew my body would not have any significant dilation or effacement until labor actually started.  I did let her check me twice and the results were exactly as expected but this time I did not leave the office disappointed. I trusted that God had designed my body in such a way that it was normal for me not to show signs of labor and until labor actually started and this provided me with peace.  Instead of sitting around waiting for the baby, I would give myself something to accomplish or look forward to everyday even if it was something small like a favorite dinner.  I tried to soak up as much time as I could with my two small children.  I remember looking in a mirror before going to a wedding 8 days past my due date and being filled with discontentment but I decided that there was nothing I could do to get this baby out so I'd better just choose joy for the day.  My day was much more enjoyable after I made that decision.  I kept reminding myself that a couple of weeks was nothing to the long 9 months I'd already spent waiting for my baby to arrive.  My sweet son was born early in the morning 11 days past his due date and he was just perfect! 

This was taken probably 2 days before the baby was born.  Aaron laughed so hard when I told that we were having frozen pizza for dinner for probably the first time ever in our marriage.  He insisted that we take a picture to document the occasion.